You gasp and don’t know if you’ll ever exhale again. The air seemingly gone around you.
Your mind starts racing. You see all of the worst futures played out at once in front of you.
You bargain with the universe for this to be a joke, for this to be nightmare you can wake from.
You don’t know how much more you can take. How much more you can handle.
You feel every emotion at once.
Fear for what you know is going to happen
Rage at it happening
Hope that you are wrong
Sadness that you know you are not
Sympathy for those who will be hurt from this
Inspiration to fight through it and keep moving forward
Sorrow when the inspiration disappears
Rage again
Rage again
Rage
Rage
Rage
And you mourn. You cry. You feel lost. You try to find a path through.
You let habit carry you forward.
Muscle memory.
You don’t feel strong enough but you remember a woman who literally fought until the moment she died
And then you get off the ground, you dust yourself off
and you move
the fuck
forward.
